Saturday, June 5, 2010

Disclaimer: I'm not very interesting...

Herro der,

So one of my lovely quirks is that I'm afraid of people hating me or thinking that I think I'm cool.
This is why I've been putting off writing this. However, Kimberlyn wouldn't exist if there was no Kimberly. It would just be n, and we can't have that. Unlike Berlyn, I am often scatterbrained. Therefore, this post has no theme. Kayyyy!


One thing I LOVE about us awkward girls is the number of times we say things that make people we don't really know uncomfortable. For example, there was a day when Berlyn and I were in the cafeteria standing near the condiment cart. There was some disgusting barbecue sauce (I mean, really gross. I didn't know there was a difference between different kinds of barbecue sauces, but I feel like somebody added a pint of dog saliva in the school sauce) on the ground, and Mr. Mead came over for some Ranch. Clearly trying to engage in unnecessary conversation, he said "Oh, someone spilled barbecue sauce, huh?" (Thank you for pointing out the obvious, by the way. Why didn't you just say "Hey, I wore shoes today," or "I exist?") Without hesitating, Berlyn replied "Actually, that's my blood..." Then the ever-so-familiar response ensued. Mr. Mead walked away without saying anything. Why does this always happen to us?

I guess that reaction is better than some. It's like the time Jaden's family took me out to a really nice dinner for my sixteenth birthday. My meal included tofu, and Jaden's mom asked me what it was.
"That looks good, what is it?"
"Baby."
"UGGHGHGHH OH MY GOD!"

I made Swenson really uncomfortable when I told him Berlyn and I had a pregnant experiment... calling it an experiment probably added to that... After being fake-pregnant for less than five minutes, I fell down Berlyn's stairs. Maybe I should become more coordinated before I decide to reproduce.

Okay, so on a serious note, I'm probably going to be a hoarder someday. I think this because of my coffee can full of unimportant notes I keep in my room. Looking through these notes, I found one that I had written in freshman year and apparently never given to anyone. Why I kept this, I don't know, but I'm glad I did. I write the most awkward notes to people, and now I have proof! And because I have no life on a Saturday night, I will type it up to show you:

"Yo. I'm in math right now and the class is going over the homework that I left at home.. and I already wrote Andee and Tasha notes, so.. hi! I'm bored. It's graphing. My horizontal is the negative something quadrant 3 something, apparently. Have you seen Accepted? It's funny. I saw it when it was in the theatres. It was funnier then. I saw it again this weekend with Jaden but we got bored and played with gummy bears. Have you ever played with gummy bears? I bet you haven't. You should. Haha. It's fun. 'Not only did the graph move up, the asymptote moved up!' Haha, my math teacher is so cool. You have no idea. Everyone else thinks he's weird but I don't. I bet it's hard to impress highschoolers. He just asked a question and no one answered. Hm. I love cherry popsicles. (popcisles? hah, nope) 'Are you guys excited about trig?' two people: 'woohoo!' He's telling us that he bought hamburgers and gas at Costco this weekend. 21 days of school left! I'm so excited for summer. I love it. I turn OLD this summer! Wooooot. Aristotle stuttered. I did not know that.
uh. bye!
-Kim. wooot."

I haven't got much better at communicating...
I'm sorry this doesn't have a theme...
I'll get better at this...
kthxbai.

-Kim. Kimberly? Kim...my. Kimber...lee.

4 comments:

  1. I like it :) See, I knew you could do it :)

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  2. Pretty good!!
    Love the bbq sauce and tofu.

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  3. You are soooo silly :) I had to read some of that to my mom :P I have a note from Jason almost just like the one you wrote... Except he talked about his hairy wrists and how the girl in front of him was wearing a thong and it was showing. Hahahahaha.

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  4. Hahahah, silly Jason! :) Yeah, that note was from me to James :P but I never gave it to him, obviously.

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