Saturday, February 19, 2011

I need to get off of this bus....


I'm willing to bet all the money in my accont (which isn't any) that all of you have gone on some sort of roadtrip at some point in your life. Whether it was with your family, or your friends, or your significant other across the country or just a few hours away. I am also willing to bet all of the money in my wallet (which isn't any) that none of you (or very few) have gone on a eight and a half hour road trip with about one hundred strangers....
Am I right? Am I right?

Last week I was suffering from a significant amount of panic attacks because I was to board a Greyhound bus and ride for eight and a half hours to Arizona.
What I was worried about was missing the bus... Or getting off the bus for a "break" and coming back to see it had gone. Thinking about this all still worries me...
Why was I riding this bus?
To visit my boyfriend, Axl, in Arizona.

Now. Having panic attacks is one thing. However, having nightmares is another.
I had a nightmare that I missed the bus and had to call Axl and tell him that I missed the bus and that I wasn't going to make it to Arizona.
He cried.

I woke up and lost my head.
And that was a week BEFORE I was supposed to get on the bus... So that left me to freak out for a whole week.

BUT.
Getting on the bus wasn't as bad as my mind wanted to convince me it was.
On Thursday the tenth... I left my aunts house for Hollywood. We got there and checked my bag and went over to Sharkey's mexican grill to wait.
I had tofu tacos... A strange idea, I know, but they were pretty damn good.

Anyways. After we ate, I got on the bus.
The first way was weird. Their were a bunch of gansta looking people who were loud and talkative... Like they had been friends for life.
But everyone switched buses in LA.

I had to go through a bag check and the guy telling us what terminal to go to told me I was beautiful... (Thank you sir).... And then I snuck onto the bus leaving at 2:45 instead of catching the bus I was supposed to at 4:30.... I know. I'm a rebel.

I took a seat towards the back of the bus and got comfortable.
The bus ride to Arizona wasn't very full. People sat around me but never next to me... This was because almost everyone had their own seats. This was nice. I could lay out and put my backpack next to me... All kinds of nice stuff. Except the bus stopped all the time.
My favorite stop?
I don't know the town but it was seriously after having been on the bus for ten minutes we stopped to pick up more people. I didn't get off the bus, cause I was scared, so I starred out the window at this house that sat not far from the station.

Not only did this house have a shed built out of random metal objects.... But it also had about twenty different sized manaquins nailed to the roof... They were dressed in clothes and doing at least one of the following activities: Driving a car, riding a bike, or FALLING OFF OF THE ROOF.
Yeah... Some were children, some were adults... I swear the two driving the car were gremlins.
It was so weird.
The guy sitting behind me kept trying to convince his sleeping wife that the house had people on the roof. She wasn't buying it.

"Honey. Baby. This house has people all over the roof. Their riding bikes and stuff."
"Stop it Frank"

Yeah. It was great. As we drove out of the parking lot I tried to catch a glimpse of anything telling me that this house was a museum of junk but no such luck... I wonder if it really is just someone's house.
After that, not much of the trip was very exciting. It got really dark on the bus and the drowsiness from my meds wore off... So I was left to watch cars pass on the freeway.
The weirdest things that happened on the way was we would pass cars, with their lights on, in the grassy ditches beside the freeway... I was wondering why they were sitting there. Were people having sex? Were people doing drug deals? Were people waiting for the money so they could return the annoying little girl in the back seat to her parents?
I guess I'll never know.
But this led me to think.... Would the greyhound bus stop if there was a murder happening on the side of the road? Would the driver pull over and try to help the person in trouble?
Just wondering.

Eventually I pulled out my computer and typed and when I finished typing I played Sims 3... My house caught fire.... Everyone lived but this was seriously the first time that had ever happened. I was appalled.
I had to stop playing shortly afterwards....

Then I was left to stare out into the dark gloom that is night.

We stopped for a dinner break in Blithe (great name...)... The bus driver told us to be careful walking across the street to KFC... What does that say about this place?
Anyways. I stayed on the bus forever. Afraid to get off. I finally did, telling myself to get a Nuerosleep (you know they have Nuero-Overhangovers now? crazy...) because I had slept so much on the bus I was unsure I'd be able to sleep once I got to Axl.
So I got off the bus and went into the gas station. They didn't have the drink so I got gum and a blue icee (cause that's always plan B (if they don't have this I'm gettin a blue icee)). I was standing in line and heard:

"Hey mister bus driver!"

It was this odd looking black dude. The man who replied was a short man with a pointed nose... I assumed he was our bus driver but he was another buses driver.
ANyways. They proceeded to get in an arguement about why the guy couldn't get a beer.

"What if you didn't know I consumed the beer?"
"Well I would smell it on your breath and I would have to ask you to get off of the bus"
"Well what if you couldn't tell. I hold my alcohol really well"
"I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE CAN'T JUST HOLD THEIR LIQUOR FOR SIX HOURS!"

The bus driver was in line (in front of me and two others) this whole time. The cashier just stood their like:

"Sir? You're total is...."
"Sir? You're all rung up?"
"Sir?"

Poor guy.

I got my stuff and got on the bus and then the rest of the way back wasn't a big deal.
Long. But not a big deal.

It was so cute though... I walked into the station and Axl turned around and like attacked me. It was so nice to see him. He really should be here with me... Because that was the original plan... But he has to be there. SO it just sucks. It's hard to be happy about much of anything when a big piece of your puzzle is missing.

I was there until sunday.
Then I had to get back on the bus. This way.... The bus was PACKED... They had to turn people away....

I sat next to a trucker who sat next to me because he wanted to sit beside two other truckers. Yeah... Fun...
I think I slept 90% of the way...

However... There was a drug addict on the bus.

Thirty minutes into the ride she started screaming at this guy to stop staring at her. We pulled over and the driver (who sounded like George Bush but looked like Cleavland Brown from Family Guy) tried to confront her but she barricaded herself in the bathroom.
She was okay the rest of the way. Everytime i went to the back of the bus to throw something away I could hear the other people talking about how insane she was.
At one point I was waiting to pee. And she was staring at me whispering..
"I don't care about this girl... I don't like this girl"
To herself.
I was like... I just want to pee can't this person hurry the hell up?!

She also smelt like piss.

This cute couple sat in the seats across from me and they would gossip about the girl. It was bad.

The only thing that was cool about the ride back was those windmills that collect energy from the wind. Serious... Miles and miles of these things.
It was beautiful... And strange at the same time.
My favorites were the ones that were broken and their pieces lay on the ground.. Unmoving...

My friend Tyler picked me up and when I got back I unpacked and watched the grammies with friends.
It was okay.

I really don't enjoy riding the bus...
It's gross and crunched for space and so many other things. But unfortunatly it's the only way to see Axl.... Which sucks.
It just goes to show that a lot of the time in life you have to suck it up and deal.
Otherwise you don't get want you want.

What about all of you? Have any of you had a crazy trip that you would like to share? How did you feel afterwards and why did you have to go on it in the first place?

- Berlyn

P.S. Sorry if this blog was all over the place.
P.P.S. The picture above came from an article titled "details on horrific Greyhound bus killings"... Yeah I don't know.

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